The Seat of Power

"Are you kidding me!"

I have phone calls frequently that have me thinking this as I’m listening to the stories and life situations people are in as they’re asking for help.

Taking these phone calls over and over causes me to be aware of the seat of power I sit in. Not just the seat of being the executive director of the organization they’re requesting assistance from but also from the seat of affluence that I’ve been blessed with (at least for now).

I recently had a recipient call need assistance with getting an electrical box replaced due to it still being the kind with screw in fuses. We continue to talk and he tells me his life situation as being disabled and caring for his children in an old home. He then tells me all of the other issues with the house that he also needs assistance with. He’s on a fixed income and has no way of ever financially affording the materials, hiring the work done nor being able to physically perform the work himself. He hasn’t lived here that long and intended to fix it up when he bought it.

I’m in the “are you kidding me" phase as I’m talking to him. In my seat of power I begin judging the decisions he’s made. In my mind, how can you buy a house that you can’t afford to repair? I even go to the place of wondering how he can ask for so much work without skipping a beat. He needs tens of thousands of dollars in repair work. I just can’t fathom this from where I sit on a personal level.

There are hundreds of reasons why I can’t fathom this and the main one is that I’m not him. I can’t know for sure, but I’m sure I’ve had all kinds of experiences as I’ve grown up and been educated on home maintenance and the costs associated that he hasn’t.

In my seat of power I minimize his desire to provide for his kids and give them a place of their own. If I really think through his choices, he made what seemed to be a good financial decision knowing that his monthly payments would be really low. The reality is that his fixed income doesn’t cover rent in traditional apartment settings as well as covering all his other expenses. What’s a father to do?

I’m a pretty logical thinking. Things enter and exit my brain a lot of times in black and white terms or in terms of efficiency. It works for me most of the time, but it definitely causes me to quickly dismiss the factors that go into someone’s decision making process.

This job is hard. It’s hard on my heart, mind and soul. It’s hard to speak truth to others in their situations. It’s hard to give good advice in a crisis situation. It’s hard to do the work. It’s hard to get off my seat of power to make wise, loving decisions and choices to help others.

It reminds me that relationships are so important to the fabric of humanity and our communities. Relationships can remove the seat of power.