In Love With the Process, Not the Outcomes

Sometimes I think we’re more in love with the process than we are with the outcome. What I mean is that, we enjoy the process of creating, organizing, planning, etc.. more than we care about actually accomplishing the thing we’re organizing around. This is especially true when it comes to addressing community issues. 

I’m no expert on the conversation, but I have seen this happen so many times over the past 4 years while I’ve been the director of NeighborLink. 

Here are a few thoughts on why I think this is. 

Fear of Failure - If we’re constantly busy working on the event, program, fundraising, etc., we never have to see if we’re any good at what we’re setting out to accomplish.

Need To Be Seen - For many of us, we believe that what makes us significant is if we get rewarded for our creative ideas and our ability to see that idea carried out. “If I’m giving up my time to work on something, I’m going to do it my way," is usually the unspoken sentiment. 

We Can’t Get Along - We have a hard time getting over personality and leadership dynamics of others. We also have a hard time dropping our own dynamics and refuse to realize that we’re the cause of the tension sometimes. To join someone else’s idea, group, or event in order to make it better is dying to ourselves and if we’re honest with ourselves, we don’t like to do that often. 

It’s What We Know - One of the biggest factors to this I believe is because it’s all we know. We know more about organizing than we do about actually accomplishing what we’re setting out to do. I see this played out at NeighborLink quite often. We know how to create events and programs at churches but we rarely know what it actual takes to love our neighbors. If we knew that, we’d stop doing it the way it’s always been done. 

We Know Best - At various times we all have the best idea to address poverty and community issues. We often move away from existing ideas, structures, and organizations over the slightest variations to the process. If we can become more open and patient, usually we can get on the same page and in-turn make room for those variations. 

Passion Is Hard to Contain - Sometimes the passion that is fueling us is so strong that we have a hard time containing it. This isn’t always a bad thing, but it does cause us to push beyond existing ideas, structures, and organizations because they can’t move as fast as the ideas in our heads. The result is a strong launch with a quick burnout because there wasn’t enough to sustain a long effort.

I’m all for starting new things. I’ve just learned that it almost always requires more than what I personally can offer. I need other people, ideas, resources, and networks of people to get something off the ground that lasts. 

If any of you ever have ideas that you think are in line of what NeighborLink is doing or could be doing, please contact me. Let’s collaborate and see what we can do together.