Day 9 of Gratitude - My Daughter, Avery
31 Days of Gratitude - In an attempt to publicly express my gratitude for the people that have impacted me in some way in 2015, I'm setting out to write one post a day sharing what I appreciate about them or what moment that marked me. Some of these people I know well, some I've only met, and some I'm just getting to know. There is no ranking to these posts and they aren't meant to put anyone on a pedestal. They, like you and I, are imperfect people with their own flaws, some you may have experienced. Despite those flaws, I believe we all need to have our positive characteristics called into light and celebrated. This is that attempt.
Avery is easily one of the greatest things I've ever known. She is an old soul living in a 5-year old body and teaches me 100 times a day how to be a better person by her grace, joy, kindness, and enthusiasm as she processes the discoveries she makes every day as she develops as a kid. She's brilliantly smart, terribly shy, and one of the kindest people I've ever had love me. I want to do all that I can as a father to protect the characteristics that make you such a wonderful kid.
I don't deserve the patience and grace she gives me as I fumble as a father, a man, and as a husband to her mother. Every day that goes by when I recognize that I'm being short with her, annoyed by the thousandth time she's told or asked me something as she seeks reassurance of what she's learning, I'm left wondering when the day will come when she'll turn back at my short temper with the right words that set me in my place once and for all. I sense those days are numbered, and I hope that my grace for her childlike wonder increases so that day never has to come.
This year as she's entered kindergarten, I'm grateful for the flexibility in my work schedule that affords me the opportunity to take her to school almost everyday as well as pick her up twice a week. I've been able to observe her personality and learn what makes her excited, gives her anxiety, and how she interacts with peers. I see much of myself in her and when she gets overly anxious, I want to tell her in a way she understands that it'll be alright one day. You just continue being you, because you're the best little kid I know and who cares if you're shy. Introverts are ok, too. Just be kind, respectful, and it'll be alright. I also sense that these after school hangouts we get are some of the best times of her elementary school years we're going to have. So, I take full advantage of them by going on dates to play video games, drink coffee, run errands, and get ice cream or watch TV together.
I'm grateful for your spirit, Avery Grace. You're beautiful and I'm honored to be your father even on the days I'm ready for you to give me 15 minutes of silence and push you away. Keep reminding me that you're more important than anything else I could be spending my time on. I'm aware and trying to learn how to love you well every day. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life being your dad and seeing how you bring joy to those around you.
